I need to loan you the book I have written by a french 13 year old. Yes. It can't get much worse than that.

Also, I almost always have some sort of library fine. It's impossible when I check out 8+ books at once (which I rarely ever read before I've renewed them three times) and I'm lazy about checking the dates. Luckily I mostly don't see the same librarians. Especially lucky because I often am leaving with a crazy amount of books (so much I can't see) and it is rather amusing, though I'm often the only one chuckling.