(For the Scene to be Changed)

Well, I suppose I really ought to just come out with it, especially as Mum has mentioned it in enough public places for me to feel as if it's all right to share with my general intimate sphere, and yet the words don't want to be typed, I suppose--maybe typing them will make things more confusing, or have me attached too deeply; and yet it's far too important not to be said, and some certain persons who read this blog already know--and look, now you know how I sound when I am actually talking, rambling on and on and on and on as if I haven't the foggiest notion what a full stop is. All right: I shall just come out and say it.

Mum is pregnant again.

At any other time we would all be absolutely beside ourselves with elation, but instead we're all rather nervous, or More Than Nervous and pretending to be Simply Nervous for the sake of our general sanity. It's only been three months since we lost baby Jabez, and so we're all (i.e., Mum, Dad, and I, as no-one else in the immediate family knows--and I wasn't even supposed to know, except that Mum told me before Dad told her not to, so we're pretending that I don't know) worried that something is going to go wrong. And yet--it almost seems like a gift, a real God sort of thing: the baby's due date is almost a year to the day that we found out that Mum was miscarrying Jabez (and Dad lost his job, and we basically had The Week/Month From Hell).

So, pray: as hard as you can. I don't think any of us are ready to go through losing another baby.